Chess is Life

As I said in a previous entry, I love chess. Chess has been one of the loves of my life since I learned how to play in middle school. All during school (yes, high school, too), I played in tournaments and played chess at lunch and after school or before school, or whenever I could find time to play. I even had my own portable chess set. I still do, though it is not the same set I owned in school.

I still don't really know what drew me to the game. I just remember my best friend Kim teaching me one day after school as we waited for his little brother to get out of elementary school. (Middle school got out about an hour before elementary school, so we would walk over to the elementary school and wait with his mom. My neighbor's mom would all take my brother, me, her son and one of our friends home after school, so this was a very nice arrangement for the time being.)

And honestly, I am one of the best players I have ever met. Not the best, mind you. I was never state champion or anything- though I did beat him in a game after school one day- but I was, and am, very good.

Of course, after we graduate from high school, adulthood takes on a whole new meaning. What we think will matter to us, no longer does. And the things that we thought nothing of suddenly become big factors in our lives. And so, I pretty much gave up chess for most of my twenties. I guess I could say that I didn't really give it up so much as I really couldn't find anyone to play. This is not from a lack of searching. I searched in the phone book, I went to the library, I looked as far as I could for a chess club in my city, but to no avail. This was before the heyday of the internet, of course (Did I really just say that?) so it was not as easy to connect with folks as it is now.

But despite the lack of cultivation for my love of chess, it has always had a place in my heart. Sure I challenge the occasional player now and then. But, I don't do it for the challenge. I do it for the memories. I just love the game, and even though every person but one I have played since high school has become fodder for my record, I still love the thinking and the strategizing. I especially love seeing others strut around and saying just how good they are and the smacktalk they spout before I utterly crush them.

Sigh. I'm getting all teary-eyed just thinking about it.

Who was the person that beat me, you ask? It was my Command Sergeant Major (CSM) for my unit. Like the nerd that I am, I brought my chess board to our company picnic, not to challenge anyone, really, but to give the option in case someone wanted to play something besides volleyball and spades. I set it up and walked away. Like a worm on a hook. And I got some good bites.

Two guys challenged me in the few hours we were there. One just played. The other was rife with the huffing and puffing and "What'cha gonna do about that huh?" and made all kinds of sudden noises when he moved his pieces. ("BAM!" "SMACK!" Batman would have been proud.) It was the most humorous game and most satisfying win I had had in a while.

Then, right before the end of the day, I caught a couple guys talking to the CSM and kinda looking my direction, as if I were the playground bully and they were tattling on me. A few minutes later, the CSM challenged me to a game. And well, you know the end of the story. But, I played valiantly... but stupidly. Usually, when I play a game against someone who I know I can beat (which is everyone?), I don't really try my hardest. I don't give much thought to my moves. I don't have a problem with making a questionable move because most chess players don't pick up on it and if they do, don't do what is necessary to capitalize on it. In addition, I'm a good enough player that even if they do capitalize on my intentional mistake, I can make up for it with a little more effort.

My CSM was different. I played very, very well in the beginning. I secured the middle. I pinned his pieces. I made him work for his position on the board. And then, I got cocky. I pulled an intentional mistake because I didn't feel like thinking too hard. I lost a bishop. And then he forced a queen exchange. (For the uninitiated, the queen is the most powerful piece on the board. Most players can survive a point deficit if they have their queen. Forcing an exchange magnifies any kind of point or position deficit because the other pieces are minor pieces. Having one more bishop or knight isn't so much a big deal when both players have their queens. When the queens are taken out of the game, every piece counts.) And from there, it was downhill. Yes, I took a lot of time to think about my moves from that point on. But it was too late. The damage had been done and I had limited my own options because of my refusal to play well. He beat me fair and square and I will be sure to return the favor in Kuwait. But I realized on that day that life is much more like chess than any other game in the world.

I once heard that the number of possible positions on a chess board is equal to the number of atoms in the universe. Sounds far fetched, true, because that's a lot of atoms and the chess board has only 64 squares and 32 pieces. But, the spirit of the saying is accurate. In that same vein, I realized that the process of life is very similar to the game of chess.

In chess, you have three phases of the game: beginning, middle and end. Beginning is obvious. The very end is obvious. But sometimes, the boundaries between the three can be blurred. Some think that middle game starts when the first piece is taken. Others think that end game starts once a majority of the pawns are taken. But, the controversy, if it can be called that, is symbolic of life itself.

See, when you begin a game of chess, you have only ten pieces that you can move: eight pawns and two knights. Even then, it is really only adviseable to move about four of those pawns (the King, Queen and two Bishop pawns) because those four help control the center, which is where most of the action in middle game takes place. The pawns represent youth, I think. How well you start your game in the beginning, how effectively you free up your minor pieces for movement determines how well your middle game is going to go.

There are folks out there who say they can play chess. But that is really all they know how to do. They know the movements of the pieces and that is it. There is no forethought to the movements, no realization to what each piece enables or prevents the other pieces to/from doing. There is a lack of understanding of the consequences of their actions. For instance, the most popular first move in chess is moving the King Pawn two spaces, to e4 or P-K4. This should be countered with only a couple of moves, one being e5 or P-K4 by black. (There are other good counters, but this blog is long enough as it is.) You would be surprised by how many of my opponents answer my P-K4 with P-KR3, or something as equally impotent. (If you are one of those, I am sorry, but that is a terrible move. Go read a chess book.) They moved the King Rook Pawn because they could. There was no thought to the fact that it was a wasted move and it will not allow any movement of their minor pieces. By making that move, they've handicapped their middle game and allowed their opponent at least one unopposed move.

Moving out the minor pieces (Bishops, Knights), is called developing them. The minor pieces represent the middle parts of our lives. How well we capture the center of the board, how easy we make it for our own pieces to move around to board to attack and defend all depends on how well the first two or three moves went. By wasting the opening moves, a player is handicapped for the middle of their game/life because they cannot use the minor pieces to their potential. Sure, they can move the pawns out in mid-game and start moving the minor pieces out, but look how much time has been wasted! By this point, I've already got a plan for checkmate... and I've probably already announced it!

And then finally, end game occurs. For some, there is no end game. Their game ends in the middle because of poor play and checkmate occurs in less than say, 20 moves. But some play a good game of catch up and we make it to end game. But their opportunites are limited. By this time, most of their minor pieces have been taken and they are on the run. The game is closing in on them and there are few places for the king to hide. "Check" has been announced a couple times, probably, and that sense that the end is near is beginning to grow.

And all of this because of less than five moves in the very beginning? Well, sometimes. Some are just outplayed. Others, like me, make one dumb move and never recover. But I honestly believe that we rarely have the chance to fully understand the consequences of our actions. I fully believe that, like chess, our opportunites in the middle and end are made by how we play in the beginning. Some pull it out by being smart in the middle. But playing badly the whole game rarely ever scores a win in the end.

I somewhat see myself in this. I squandered my youth. I didn't go to college until I was about 20 and I went part time for about seven years until I joined the Army in 2002. For a long time, I really thought that I had handicapped the rest of my life because of the inaction and mistakes of my youth. But, my middle game is really shaping up, let me tell you. I've been doing well for myself. I got promoted to E-5 much earlier than most people and I am on track with getting my degree in about a year, after working so hard the last two or three.

I'm never going to have the same options open to me that I had ten years ago. But in a manner of speaking, I'll have more because I feel I have been able to recover my middle game before it was too late.